[Sam P. Davis, A Stock Chapter, from Short Stories (1886)]

 

A Stock Chapter.

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            Hezekia the husband man lived in the valley of Carson, hard by the city of Sheridan.

            One day he girded his loins and came unto the chief city with his corn, apple-juice and muskrat skins.

            And he met a man upon the corner of the street who was of comely appearance, who said unto him :

            " Behold, there is ore in the north-end of great richness, and the value thereof is two hundred ; now is the time to buy."

            The stranger was smooth of speech, and Hezekia harkened unto him.

            And they drank together and made merry over the prospect, and the stranger said :

            " See that you tell no man of this, for behold if ye do the hand of terror would be upon me and mine forever." And Hezekia swear an oath.

            " I will tell no man, not even the wife of my bosom or the neighbors who till the fields hard by."

            And when he had sworn the oath he went home, and behold, he proclaimed unto them :

            " Buy ye of the stocks of the north-end, and haste ye to gather them in, for the boom is at hand and will come

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upon us like a thief in the night. Harken unto the voice of Hezekia for he hath a point."

            And the wise men shook their heads, saying :

            " How is this that thou comest to us with these points, who art thou that thou knowest good from evil ? Is there not the horse of porphyry in the north drift, and behold do not the bears gather in Pine street to destroy us? Go to, ye deceiver of the people."

            And he answered them:

            " Ye fools that listen not to the voice of the prophets nor the sayings of the posted."

            And many who heard him said :

            " Is this not Hezekia the tiller of the soil and the man of the Lord?"

            And they bought at the topmost figures.

            And Hezekia mortgaged his possessions, and got a hundred shares on a margin and he said unto his wife : "We will visit Milan, Paris and Carson in the spring." And when the spring was come the stock was much depressed, and he smote his breast and rent his clothes, saying :

            "Behold the hand of tribulation is upon me, and the terrors of hell gather me round about," and his broker called aloud :

            "Send up some mud"; and the people round about made mouths at him and said :

            "Behold the Smart Aleck ! he's a nice pill, ain't he? " and they spat upon him.

            And the holders of the mortgages came down upon the habitations of the burg, and a great cry went up.

            And one day Hezekia met the stranger of soft speech and he smote him sore upon the nose saying :

            " Why did'st thou deceive the children of men ?" and

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the stranger mopped the ground with him, and called aloud :

            "Behold ! I'm on that lay myself " ; and the police took them both in.          

            And Hezekia paid his fine and went home filled with wrath, and he vowed a vow,

            "I'll let 'em alone " ; but he could not, because of the margin and the mud.